Maybe you don't have kids by choice, or you do have kids and wish you didn't. The research on childless couples is offering some surprising results!
"Married No Kids" is a huge discussion topic on many women's sites. Childfree women discuss baby showers, celebrities' decisions to adopt, how kids behave in public, and what to tell people about their childfree status. They defend their right to have kids. They support each other in breaking the news to parents and in-laws. They vent their anger and share their feelings.
And maybe they're on to something: "Most studies have shown that psychological well-being tends to decline when people have kids," says sociologist Amy Pienta, from the University of Michigan. "In mid-life, being married or having a partner has a greater impact on a woman's well-being than whether or not she has children."
So, being with an intimate partner can provide more happiness than children! Interesting.
I wonder why psych well-being declines when you have kids…is it because you're concerned about their safety, happiness, and basic needs? I don't have children so I'm just speculating here….maybe it's because you don’t' have the same freedom that you once did. You can't pursue your own passions and goals - or fulfill your fulfill your potential - with the zeal you once did (or wish you did before the kids came along).
In our pro-family culture, being childfree really is stepping out of society's comfort zone. I don't know many people who've chosen it – though I do know some infertile couples that are childfree but not by choice.
Maybe there should be a test that prospective parents can take to determine whether they'd be happy after the kids come along (or how happy they'd be). Or a crystal ball that'll tell people if they should have kids or not -- and what the future holds with both choices.
Now, if only research could show us the effects of using crystal balls to tell the future....
