More Premarital Questions
Planning Your Marriage is More Important Than Planning Your Wedding
Your wedding day lasts a few hours; your marriage will affect rest of your life. These premarital questions will make you more comfortable saying "I do."
More Premarital Questions is a sister to Premarital Questions. Together, the articles provide a full set of premarital questions that you must ask before you get married. Planning your marriage should take more time and energy than planning your wedding day - which is why premarital questions are crucial.
You may be so wrapped up in wedding plans, you forget to plan your marriage! And any good marriage requires preparation with some good premarital questions. No matter how great your partner or relationship is, there are a few things you need to discuss and even negotiate before you get married. These premarital questions will get you started.
Location, family, recreation and spirituality are covered in these premarital questions. You'll solidify your future and reveal aspects of yourself that you didn't know existed. Even better, these premarital questions will teach you tons about your future spouse!
Before the Wedding Day: Premarital Questions
Premarital Questions About Location
1. Will we live in the city or country? Apartment, condo, or house? Big or little? Will we live overseas or in the home we grew up in? Location is the subject of many premarital questions like, Will we move regularly or plant roots for good?
2. What's our ideal neighborhood? Do we live near schools and parks, or in a highrise downtown? Do we get involved with the larger community? Do we know our neighbors well, or do we prefer our privacy?
Premarital Questions About Family
3. How much time do we spend with our families? Do we see our parents or siblings every day, or every five years? An important premarital question: Are we happy with the way it us now, or are we hoping for changes? How often do our parents visit, and for how long? Do we let our parents give advice or make decisions for us?
4. How do our families and childhoods impact our lives now? Are our familial expectations, culture, traditions, and financial obligations similar? If not, will we invest time, energy, and an open mind in exploring our different family circles? A seemingly "little" premarital question: Where do we spend holidays?
Premarital Questions About Recreation
5. How do we want to spend our time off? On weekends, do we want to watch movies or go skydiving? In the evenings, would we prefer taking continuing education classes or doing Yoga? Another premarital question is, Do we engage in activities together, or can we separate for the evening or weekend?
6. Do we take vacations? If so, do we go on safari in Africa or camping in Colorado? On a cruise or road trip? Do we spend thousands or hundreds of dollars? This may seem like a "light" premarital question but it can cause friction in marriage: Do we take vacations for a month or two, or a day or two?
Premarital Questions About Spirituality
7. Are we part of an organized faith? Do we go to church, synagogue, mosque, or the top of a mountain to pray or meditate? Are either of us marrying outside our faith? If so, will the other convert or not get involved?
8. Can we discuss God, the universe, faith, and our souls? These premarital questions are huge: Do we have thought-provoking conversations, not arguments? Do we seek to understand our partner's beliefs – not change them?
Answers to Premarital Questions
Remember, you are supposed to have different answers to these questions before marriage because you are two different people. If you completely agree on everything, someone's not being authentic, perhaps because of fear of intimacy or an inability to communicate.
Your wedding lasts a day. Your marriage will change your life -- so make sure you know what you're getting yourself into. As much as you want to be married, you need to make sure you're marrying the right person.
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